I realize that every door I open leads me to a multitude of other opening doors.
My spirit enjoys this and becomes more lively all the time, in full wonder of the endless possibilities.
I can enjoy and taste this openness at any moment, be in contact with my boundless environment, with my cup of coffee, with the keyboard of my notebook, writing for myself and for you.
Resting in this is being present, ever deeper.
A butterfly savors the nectar of the butterfly tree, royal blue is the hydrangea, children’s voices are in the background, a fluff of a dandelion floats in the air.
Life is good this way.
Sharing ever more of this with others gives me pleasure.
Joos, August 4, 2013
I can worry about it
be precarious
exhaust myself in my efforts
but it is all wasted energy
that is to say
finally it is clear to me
that wanting to have control over what will happen
doesn’t serve any purpose
We never know what will happen
All I can do is
open myself to love
Then love will be present
with what will happen
In the end it is about being who I Am and who you Are.
Nobody can tell us what that is.
When I allow myself to be I can be present without distorting myself.
In a like manner you may be.
Not because I say so, but because it is your birthright.
This, just being this.
Today is the day of the solstice, the day when the sun starts his way back in the direction of the equator.
These days the sunset has been at the most Northern place, it goes down behind a strip of land in the ocean.
From tomorrow the setting of the sun will every day be a bit more in the direction of the South.
Until in the middle of the winter the most Southern point has been reached.
On this day of the solstice I realize that I can write about what has been on my mind these days.
With an international group, led by Marc Gafni, we are creating a we space of love.
With your awareness you can connect to this field.
As far as I know it is the connection with all that lives.
It is the bond with the love intelligence that is present in everything.
We have separated ourselves from this field with our thinking minds.
It gives me a feeling of intimacy, without exactly knowing the object of the intimacy.
I ask my heart: "Will this circumstance of my life last long?"
Or: "Will this circumstance be over soon?"
My heart answers: "The practice is to feel the peace and the serenity, regardless the circumstances".
I can proceed with this.
I am following a “Unique Self Course”, given by Marc Gafni.
It has become second nature for me to disappear a bit and Marc Gafni stresses the importance of every one’s unique Presence.
My inside likes this very much, because my essence feels invited to show herself more.
One of the practices is to say softly inside myself “Yes” to whatever is happening inside and outside myself.
This “Yes” is both for positive experiences and for the negative.
So also when I have lost my keys, or when I feel angry, I say “Yes”.
In the beginning it felt like a cork of a cesspool had been removed.
I said a glorious “Yes” to the grief and the anger that came to the surface.
This has quieted down now.
To say “Yes” to all that arises doesn’t mean that you agree with everything.
The effect is that your own energy, exactly like she is, surges and is allowed to be.
After a few days I feel the need to return to inner silence.
I say Yes to inner silence, ever again Yes...
Today is the equinox, the day when the sun is exactly above the equator.
People say that there is a special energy on this day to manifest our desires.
This means for me that I want to find the courage to write and to express myself from another layer of my being.
The following is the result of this intention:
May the wildness of our Spirit
touch our flesh
and move our bodies.
May we travel as one,
like a flock of birds guided by the One hand,
as it knows where to fly over fields and oceans.
May we delight in one another’s presence
when we play the game of love.
May we feel the intimacy that is our deepest longing
and our deepest destiny.
May our yearning be fulfilled.
Every mother knows that at the root of her self-sacrifice is love.
Love for her child, her husband, her friend.
She is willing to set her own LIFE aside, if only the other will find the happiness she herself does not know yet.
She has learned this pattern from her mother and from the mothers who preceded her mother.
If she does not watch out she will convey this pattern and the confusion that goes with it to her children, and thus lack a basis inside herself.
This will take her even further from who she is at the deepest.
In the center of this confusion lies the seed of love that has been concealed.
Here is the life that is endlessly born anew, and in this place can we find the door that is the opening towards wholeness and fulfillment.
We can find the basis for the love and for our life in our bodies, in our femininity/masculinity.
In the deepest parts that sometimes have been covered with so much shame and disgust and humiliation that I hardly dare to write about it.
The love of our hearts may flow towards the deepest parts of our bodies.
We may learn to take pleasure in ourselves.
After what I wrote yesterday I want to add:
...then we will know in our hearts in which direction we want to proceed…
Now that we have passed the date of December 21th I feel that our commotion had to do with the birthing of feminine consciousness.
In ever clearer ways we will know what is meant when we talk about this way of being.
We have been training for such a long time to learn how to evade the trap of being entangled in the conflicts of duality!
Because, as soon as we resist something, we recreate the same.
There is an intelligence that is infinitely grander than our small mind.
We may entrust our troubled thinking mind to her and assume that life will search for a solution we cannot contrive yet.
This asks for surrender.
Life will flow through us endlessly then.
This Life is always here.